Going off

First off, a kick ass video before I go off on some complete bullshit. Watch it. Alberto Cerriteño’s “Shiva”:

Lately I’ve been in a “decorator” mood lately. There are these brown wooden walls, rustic but absolutely fitting style-wise in my basement. For those who’ve never set foot down there, there’s a huge piece of wall space over the couch covered by some massive Vancouver Canucks flag. While my allegiance to the hockey team cannot be comprehended despite their lackluster play recently, the space could be used for more colourful illustrations. Ever since I discovered this place I’ve been flirting with the idea of buying some original prints off the web to put on the walls. There are some crazy ass stuff out there that could work down here, but the price tags on some of them are scaring me off, not to mention the great ones have already been sold out. Hey, something to think about while I’m daydreaming in class.

Speaking of class, after two weeks of partaking in actual sessions in school, I’ve concluded that I will be utterly rocked this semester. My loud but academically brilliant international law professor insists on close to a four hour session, I’ve already failed a quiz and forgone some easy ass marks in my Atlantic Canada class – yawn – by forgetting to write up a response paper to the readings last week. Normally I don’t freak out over small percentages lost in classes but these days I actually need that freakin’ GPA to go up as my acceptance into co-op this fall depends on it to be at a sufficient level. Three years later, and I wish I never dicked around in school during first year. A lesson for you kids out there.

Once in a while I start thinking about quitting my job, then after a bit I start telling myself I love my job, which then this process of thought repeats over and over again a few weeks later. It’s a great job. Lots of benefits, the people there are rosey and I’ve already committed to over a year of my life at that place, so you could imagine why I’m still gripping this long with the idea of leaving. But looking at my situation now, with school and work robbing other aspects of my life not to mention some severe overlap between the two, I’m starting to see why a lot of my friends and oldies left a while ago. Work can drain you, school can rape you. Three days at school – one mega long ass day – and three days at work. It’s a killer I tell you.

I stayed home last Friday, content with being the social outcast that night and wasted away on video games, movies and TV. I have one day off to myself, before last Friday I never stayed home for at least 24 hours. It’s fucking scary how things are right now. Already the third week and I’m burnt out, though it was not as if I did not anticipate this anyways. My sleeping schedule still has not recovered -currently 3:15 in the morning – due to my late school and work hours essentially making me a nocturnal being. I’m fucked man.

I was talking to Bryan and Henry a while ago about this. I tossed the idea of giving up school and possibly work for a year and just running wild, some traveling and doing some me things. Bryan told me that I should, making a point that I’ve practically spent four fucking years burying my head within the world of academia. Four fucking years of my prime spent inside reading books superficially and writing papers that don’t make any sense to me. It’s crazy. I’m probably going to chicken out on skipping an entire year but you never know what will happen right? I realized four months didn’t do it for me this past summer, how about eight?

Sorry, I’m going off on a rant.

I picked up the guitar again. It’s been a while, mostly because I’ve been so fucking busy and out of energy to do complex tasks such as plugging in an instrument. It sounded good, it felt good again. I found out I still have that rock star urge in me after four years of dormancy. I gotta start playing in public again, those were some good days. But I have to get this work and school crap dealt with first.

And before I part, I urge you to listen to ‘The ’59 Sound’ by The Gaslight Anthem. I’m digging into the album right now, and so far I’m liking what I’m hearing.

Comment from c - January 19, 2009 at 11:36 AM

i think about decor almost everyday and it’s true… it’s the price tags that send me running if anything else.

school sucks. i want to travel and i’ll probably be too chicken to skip out on school for a whole year too. though i am pretty set on travelling somewhere when i graduate before i look for a job… but i can’t predict the future especially when i have no money to travel once out of school so that just means i have to get a job first and travel later. i should start buying lottery tickets so that maybe i can win a lot and actually afford to skip out of finding a job for a year to travel.

Comment from c - January 19, 2009 at 11:38 AM

oh and p.s. thanks for putting some themes into my site lols… i would respond on facebook, but i often forget or put it off… blogs are where it’s at anyways 🙂

Comment from Matt - January 19, 2009 at 12:15 PM

no worries mang, i was wondering why you liked the default theme so much, then i realized that was all you had!

i gotta buy my lottery tickets too… though i doubt very much my lucky numbers are lucky enough to take me to the promised land.

Comment from sammie - January 19, 2009 at 4:55 PM

Your basement is such a big space, its got potential. Shit does cost a lot though = / I’m going to IKEA to buy some shelving, I feel better spending money on shelving than art; practicality has to count for something … even though I know you value the cool factor very highly.

School’s a bitch. For something that is supposed to be so important for our future, it sure doesn’t feel that significant at the moment. Schools will always be there for you to attend, but soon we’ll get old and tired and won’t have the spirit to go traveling and living it up. I’m considering taking a break after I finish my diploma that will take me many years to get. Even if I don’t travel, I can work and take a break from trying to be scholarly. Whatever you do, hope it makes you happy = )

ps I love that video, the animals are amazing!

Comment from Sam - January 19, 2009 at 9:50 PM

Well I can definitely relate to you in regards to the school and work issue but I wish you luck anyways. You always end up pulling through in the end, just beware of the danger zone. 😉

In terms of school, work and travel, I think that you should never get too comfortable in being away from school because it’s a hard routine to get back into. With that said, I don’t think you could see yourself travelling anywhere for a full year without living and working there. A semester lasts for four months so if you really want to do the travel thing, just take off one semester and travel for however long you want to in that time. And in terms of money for travel, you should be saving up now!! I already have my post-graduation travel fund started so that it takes money off of my paycheque automatically, you should try depositing a certain amount every time you get paid as well so that your travel fund is set up and ready to get you started when you get serious about going somewhere.

Comment from Matt - January 20, 2009 at 1:16 AM

@sammie: shelving’s cool too, you need a place to compress all the stuff you have in one spot rather than on the floor like me.

@Sam: that is true, like i said i’ll probably chicken out of doing a full year off. i think a max of eight months would be nice, some time to screw around at home and some more time to just go globetrotting.